It's intriguing to see the insecurities in people.
(This is not a patrionizing observation from a higher point of view, only a comforting observation from another insecure seed in an overgrown garden)
yet, just as an aside - I am deathly afriad of people reading my thoughts, what I put down here, and yet.... here it is. Could this be torture? or perhaps an effort to overcome insecurities? perhaps an affirmation of my own genius of which I too inconsistantly believe in? Whatever the case...
insecurities...
they're interesting.
The other day, I spent the afternoon with a woman who many would say has many insecurities - or is she just more prone to display them than the rest of us? It doesn't really matter what the insecurities were, just that they were there, obvious and commented upon over and over again.
makes me wonder...
are there intellectually superior people? are there phyically superior people? emotionally? mentally? (no not really the same), aesthetically?
could there be - aside from glaring obvious differences such as metres of height or crippling disabilities - any real differences? Doesn't it boggle the mind how much we can acomplish yet are struck back because of these insecurities?
It's not the stupidity of humans that make us weak to "consumerism" or temptations of selfishness. It is only our insecurities and our need to latch on to anything we can cling to in order to make us feel better/loved/like we belong.
And yes, this includes my weblog, out there for all 170 hits (probably 150 of them my own) and seeking approval.
Perhaps it isn't all about approval or acceptance but I can not say there isn't a large part of insecurities that are at play. I most definately feel pride as I know that someone out there, whom I do not know, is interested in my words. It makes up for all the times I have heard myself yabbering on to someone during a conversation while inside my head I am yelling to just shut the fcuk up!!! I feel that perhaps someone out there wants to hear what I have to say, not because they love me and know me well, but because I am actually an interesting person. period.

hahahaha, hehehe, he, ha, cough cough, ahem

Soooooo,
* one month until my papers are due and I have forgotten what I'm writting about
* my volunteer job is the only thing that gets me out of bed these days - the paying jobs are really sucking the gofer butt these days
* my friend at work is getting harrassed by a co-worker and our boss has decided that "he tends to believe the man's side of things when issues are raised"
(I can't believe I heard that from a person that walks up-right and has supposed to have evolved)
* we have a new room-mate (good), so I can't walk around naked anymore (bad)
* It's a beautiful day - so good-bye!